AlmOst ReaDy. . .

Just for Aunt Susie. . .

"Mad" Coping Skills. . .

Okay, so who cares why I haven't "posted" in almost three months. . .more on that later--maybe another three months.

Let's talk about what I did TODAY. . .

I did THREE different classes at THREE different times at this place. . 

I drank about about 33 millions ounces of this stuff. . 

And I WASTED over three hours watching this dumb girl make some dumb moves. . .

On this dumb show. . .

Then after I got home from the third cardio class of the day at Golds I pushed play on my answering machine. . .stupid move.  Yep, THREE different messages from the hospital wondering "where I was."  Seriously---how in THE HELL did I forget I was supposed to work tonight...  So here I am on 4 hours sleep from the night before (damn 5:30 a.m. class at the gym) and with a fried brain secondary to a huge influx of caffeine, 'artificial flavors', and mind numbing TV. . .OHHHHH, AND, Jullian--whatever her name is on the Bachelorette--keeps saying (when referring to her boy toys) "him and I."  AHHHHHH, soooo buggy!!  Seriously, you can't even use proper grammar on reality TV.  Bad grammar may be the thing that sends me way over the edge.  Oh, mercy---Hope no one get seriously ill tonight.

And, clearly, I need to come up with some better, more productive coping mechanisms.

SPLENDIDLY delightful. . .

I hope your day is this delightful. . .

Cheers,

c.

Easter photos galore!

First things first---- this is my DREAM Easter basket.  Besides all things gospel and family. . .these are two of my favorite things in the whole world.

So get ready for an indulging amount of photos. . .sometimes I just can't stop myself.  As naughty as they are equally as cute--and I'm pretty sure I am not biased.

I hope you all had a very happy Easter.  I most importantly, I hope you all celebrated at the church of your choice.  It is so sad that Easter gets so over run by bunnies, chicks, and eggs.  Don't get me wrong, as you will see by the photos below I think all that stuff is very fun and we get into the hoopla.  But this year I really tried to remind the boys (several times) what Easter was about.  And apparently, I failed.  Saturday night Ash asked me if "we had to go to chuuuch tomouaw since it is Easteawww?"  Seriously. . . arggg.  Hopefully Ade is a better teacher than I am.  He jumped right in saying, "Ash, we are going to church ESPECIALLY on Easter, cause on Easter we celebrate Jesus' resurrection."

Well, maybe next year we'll do better teaching.  Until then, here are some pics from our weekend.

Egg dying.  

Ava asleep. . .check!

Stinky vinegar to make those colors vibrant. . .check.

Lots of paper towels. . .check.

Stickers, hot glue, shrink wrap. . .check times 3

18 cooled, hard boiled eggs that nobody (but me) in my family will eat. . .check

2 eager/impatient boys. . .check, check.

This is the one I used hot glue on.  I thought I was so cool--putting glue dots on they dying the egg.  Pealing off the glue--poof--polka dot egg.  The boys thought it was cool for about 4.3 seconds.

So we may have all had dyed fingers for church the next day. . . oh well.

And you may have noticed that I (the mom) was actually IN a couple of the photos.  You ask yourself. . .self-timer?  Nope, Q!  Yes, there he was snapping a few pics.  One, to PRETEND like he was "helping" or "involved" at all.  And two, to alleviate some of his guilt for running out during our dye time and doing this. . .

Yep, my awesome Q was skiing ON THE WATER on April 11th.  Giddy, just plain old eleven year old girl giddy. . .that's what he was as I listened to his flip flops clickidy click up and down the hallway gathering his stuff.  I think the air temp was MAYBE 60 degrees and the water--pretty much freshly melted snow.  Good thing we are done having kids cause I am pretty sure he froze his ^&#%$*& off.  

But-- big ole grin all over his sheepish face when he came home.

So this pic is not from the Saturday outing (my camera lens would have frozen up).  It is actually from a tournament last summer.  But can I just say. . .

check out those freakin guns!  You go hon!!  WHEEEWWW!

Fast forward a couple of hours and here is what the Easter Bunny got ready.  All by her freakin self, I might add.

I just had to throw this pic in. . .Smash is thrilled about his Easter hat.  I really do take great joy in torturing my children.

Easter morning. . .checking out the loot.

Ready for church--still checking out the loot.  Since I am not the most timely person there was ZERO time for cute posed-pretty-lookin-Easter-outfit-pics.  Alas, another goal for next year.

After church---baskets, eggs, dresses, hats, smiles--well, maybe not so much of the latter.

Smash has a new favorite color. . .yep, blue--anything blue.  He loved this blue egg and held it for nearly 2 days.

This egg had yummy candy in it--Ade was smelling and maybe smooching it a bit, such a ding dong!

The back of the dress.  The curls were way cuter before church. . .

And here she is.

All Easter pretty.  Minus the blue sharpie marker down the right side of her face.  Fresh from that morning--oh well, another goal, to shoot for.

Ash was pretty over it my now--but still so yummy!

And my potato. . .he has learned in his 7 short years that nothin makes mom happier than a great smile and cooperation during picture taking!

The family pic.  Ade should fill Ash and Ava in on the tid bit of info explained above.  

Did I mention how bright the sun was that day--wowza, I should have bought pastel shades for everyone.

Q's attempt to get the kids in good moods for the upcoming pics---just kidding.

He really just likes to watch them stumble around and grass stain their new duds.

After some family "quiet time."  (My absolutely, positively, most favorite time of the entire week!!!)  We headed to the back yard for a "hunt." The kids found the eggs they dyed as well as some plastic eggs with money and candy.

Ava was more into doing this than hunting for eggs. . .

I especially love the outfit he put together.

Mr. intense.  He is "so going to find all the eggs."

Good times, dudes, I sure love you!

Dryin' up. . .

It was one week ago tonight that I nursed Ava to sleep for the last time.  It was so sad.  I was so torn.  I knew it was time and I knew nursing was just comfort for her--the nutrition aspect was up about 6 months ago.  And she was nursing ALL the time.  Morning, mid-morning, nap time, wake-up from nap time, evening, and before bed. . .not to mention all the times in between when she would get hurt, was sad, or just plain bored and I was sitting on the couch.

At the same time that is what made it so sad for me.  I felt awful and selfish taking away her comfort.  And I did NOT want to face the fact that my baby is growing up.  I HATE IT.  I'll say it again, I HATE IT.   I hate my kids growing up.  I just happens way too fast.  (I am the kookoo mom who thinks that kids should starts school at around 8 and then just go half a day.  It just seemed like with the boys that they quit nursing--then it was big toddler time and boom, preschool, now Aiden is going to be EIGHT and getting baptised this fall.  I'm going to need some meds. . .

Anyway, last Thursday night was brutal.  You know that terrible, huge lump that develops in your throat and no amount of Diet Coke will dissolve it?  Yep--me--lump--lots of Diet Coke.  So when she fell asleep in my arms and she was not even "leisure nursing" anymore the floods started.  Q was nice and tried to be comforting but I think he was really biting the inside of his cheek trying not to laugh.  So I held her until one side of her head was covered in sweat from the nook of my arm and the other side was covered in her crazy mom's tears. Then off to bed for her and off to "second-guess-myself-land" for me.  

I also think a lot of the sadness was due to the thought of not having a baby again.  The whole "this is it" mentality.  You know, one phase of your life ending--pretty cliche' but non-the-less sad.  I realized Thursday night that, all together, I have nursed a baby of just a few months shy of SIX YEARS!  ( I so deserve a boob job--or as I like to call it, a "breast RESTORATION" not, "augmentation.")  

The next morning I nursed her one last time when she woke up.  But the morning routine is usually short and lacking the snuggle time--so much less traumatic for me.  Ava was off to tease the boys and I was busy packing for my "no more ta-ta weekend."  My friend, Robyn, and I went to Utah for and photography class and some shopping (more on that later).

So fast forward the weekend.  Ava did great for Q, by the way.  I got home Sunday afternoon with really sore huge boobies.  Ava was asleep and I searched the medicine cabinet for something to take that would be really bad for Ava if she nursed.  I thought this would help with the temptation--but alas, no toxins in the medicine cabinet.  This is where a fresh import from South America would have come in handy--ohh well, no laws broken either.  I was going to have to go on sheer will power--something I really suck at.  (pardon the pun)

Sunday night was sheer hell and torture.  She was so tired and crying A LOT.  She just kept pulling at my shirt and pointing at the couch.  Q put her down and I took at Tylenol PM and went to bed with a whopping dose of guilt.  Monday, is a day I would like to forget.  We both cried. . .a lot.  She was heartbroken and I felt like such a jerk.  I don't think I sat down at all until she went down for a nap--yet another round of torture.

Luckily it was a beautiful day so we spent most of it outside ("ouuuuusiiiiiii" in Ava speak) doing this. . .

This little peanut LOVES to swing.  And the higher, the better!!
And, yes, she totally loves her shades.  They may have been one of the many guilt gifts I picked up for her in Salt Lake. . .
And, no, I'm pretty sure she could not be any cuter. . .

We went cold turkey with Aiden, too.  I went to Seattle for 3 days with Q, leaving Ade with my mom.  I nearly got off the plane before it left Twin Falls--again, I was sooooo sad.  But another nurse I worked with got on just then and sat by me.  Whewww.  But when we got home, Ade was very sad and dramatic. . ."Ta Ta NOOOO GONE!!" As he threw his head back in anguish.  He pretty much ignored me the rest of that day with the exception of the occasional crusty from his dad's lap.  But the next morning. . . all better and we were friends again.  There was n mention of ta ta again.

Back to Ava--

So Monday night was aging pure H & T, again.  But I was determined to figure out a way for the two of us to have some quality bed time together.  The boys (especially Ash) loved to read before naps and night time.   I knew this would, for sure, be a part of our routine.  But I also wanted to incorporate some milk drinkage, too.  She does not like cow's milk.  So we were at the store and I picked up a little jug of strawberry milk--"look Ava, pink milk."  She held it in the store so I was holding out hope.  I warmed it up and went to get her from Q's lap.  

I said, "time for nigh nigh, Ava."

She--covered her eyes.

"let's go nigh nigh"

eyes covered.

This went on multiple times until I foiled her plan and made her realize that even though I see could not see me I COULD still see her! HA.

Warm pink milk. . .check

Woobie. . .check

Baby. . .check

Books. . .check

She still cried and I went to bed thinking, "who cares if she comes home from Kindergarten to nurse and I am still fat-n-frumpy. . ."  Hatin' it!

Tuesday. . .sad, sad morning.  I just walked around the house holding her.  I'm pretty sure she had candy for breakfast--damn that guilt.

But Tuesday at nap. . .breakthrough. . .we read her books, took a couple of tokes off the milk, and I turned her around (post reading) onto my shoulder--we rocked.  And she did not try to "assume the position" or paw at me once!  I put her in her bed with baby, woobie, and sippy and she cried pointing to the rocking chair.  In a moment of inspiration I grabbed "Gossie and Gertie."  She stopped crying and sat up in her crib.  

I left

And returned 10 minutes later to find this. . .

V-I-C-T-O-R-Y!!!

So fast forward a few days and we have a routine!!  She naps and goes to bed like a champ and we still get lots of snuggle time!  Love it.  Here are the "must haves."

She loves her baby, squeezes her the whole time we are reading.  And she lays her head on her "woobie" (another guilt gift--I was looking for something like this and Robyn's keen eye spotted it---sooooo soft and soooo cute--yummy pink and brown.)  And of course these 2 books--I have read them 6 times each in the last 3 days.  But I am so not complaining!

"Gossie and Gertie" was one of Asher's most favorite books when he was tiny.  He was such a dream child to 'wean.'  He LOVED to read books before naps and bed.  We stared with naps.  We would read and rock then he would point to his bed when he was ready.  Seriously. . .dreamy.  Then we moved to reading before night time and he loved it, again pointing when he was ready.  (Often times before I was ready to lay him down.)  Although, the difference was Ash had a binkie in his mouth, one or two in each hand and others scattered about his crib.  

Soon I was down to just nursing Asher in the morning.  Then after a few weeks of that Q and I went to Mexico for a week.  My parents and Q's mom and sister stayed with the boys.  We got home and there was no mention of "ta ta."  EASY BREEZY!   (getting off the binkie is a whole different story and an upcoming post.)

Here are some yummy pics of the little turkey. . .

I love his little personality--when the kiddo is grumpy there is no talking him down but when he is happy he is sooooo happy and animated.  This shot depicts his delighted face as it often is. . .excited!
Have a great day.  I'm going to take more ibuprofen and tylenol PM as I try to ward off the mastitis deamons!

NEEEENNNRRRRR NEEEENNNRRRR NEEEENNNNNRRRRR

I have sooooo much to blog about but this little event is going to get the moment now.  Mostly because it is quick and easy and I have 5 minutes. . .but if I'm being honest it is really because the gratification is exuding from my pores and I need to get it down in text so I can "wipe this smirk off my face."

So here is the 411.  Last night Quinn and I were working with Aiden on his 50 in a minute.  It is this math homework biz that Ade is struggling with a bit.  Now he is up to subtraction to 10 and it is not coming as fast as he is used to---so he is frustrated.

But enough about Ade, here is the real goods!!  I challenged Q to a "math off."  He just gave me this look--

--this "as if you even stand a chance, woman" look.  The pompousness was oozing off his five-o-clock shadowed face.

Set the timer for one minute--and GO!!!

I was on fire. . .I was not focused on him at all--he is usually quite good at math.

-but alas, the quickness fails him.

I soooooo wish I had a snapshot of his face (a hard copy to share, not just the one in my head) when I threw my arms in the air. . ."DONE!!!"

He looked at me like I had 4 heads---his thoughts quickly turning to disbelief.  Until the evidence was there.

Right there is black and white ( that Micheal Jackson song just popped into my head. . .ohhh)

And right in front of his recently fallen face. . .yeaaaa baby!!!!!!

So this first pic is after Aiden told on me and said, "dad, mom is totally going to blog about this."  And Q smugly  and sarcastically said, "why don't you take a picture and scrapbook it, baby."  

I nearly peed my pants cause I was already on my third photo---so between snorts and kegals I told him to come in here.  When he saw I was actually photographing the evidence he was "buggin hard." 

I'll leave it up to you to guess which finger this is in the photograph.

This is a pic of round two--per his request after the first schooling.  When he accepted his defeat and while he was trying to figure out how I cheated (cause, really, no way could I beat him THAT bad. . .)  

The results. . .got him by 5!  But probably more like 7.  By this time we had an audience and I was trying to demonstrate sportsmanship.  So I finished, quietly, and planted this giant smugness on my face that only Mr. Q could interpret.

And here is the "stunning" first round. . . a HUGE loss by EIGHT!!!  

Now if I can just figure out how to spell---- neeenerrr, neeeneerrrr, neeeenrrrrr. . .

I sure love you, honey, but never underestimate 'THE MOM.'